The book? Carole Leathem’s debut, Finding Joy in My Messy Life: How I’m Surviving My Husband’s Struggles with Anxiety, Depression, and Suicidal Thoughts.

The title alone hooked me. Because before I even had the book in hand and opened to the first page, I was curious to learn Carole’s answer to that “how”: How does she survive her husband’s struggles with anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts? I wanted to know! In reading that title, I thought, Here is a woman who understands pain and yet still manages to find joy today. I’ll bet she could teach me a thing or two.

I was right.

From page one, Carole gently unfurls her story in a compassionate, empathetic, and relatable way. She drew me in, answering bit by bit the reader’s primal question: What happens next?

Carole reminds readers that while we may not know always know where to turn for help, we are never alone. She shares her experiences with great authenticity, and in doing so, she demonstrates how we can experience joy in the midst of heartache, and that we are truly loved by our Heavenly Father.

I do want to clarify that to appreciate this book, you don’t need to have a husband who struggles with anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts. I don’t. But Carole’s story and her approach stretch far more widely than that. If you have any kind of a messy life, past or present, I daresay you’ll come away with more than a few helpful nuggets and encouragement.

And if you don’t have a messy life? There’s something here for you too.

I like how Carole puts it:

If your life is a mess, I am right there with you. If your life is not a mess right now, those of us in a mess need you. We need you to be there for us. We need your strength to encourage us, to hug us, to sit quietly with us. We need you to point us to God so we can find joy in our messy lives.

— Finding Joy in My Messy Life

The whole book is really an in-depth exploration of the first several verses of the book of James, in which the apostle famously says,

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds…

James 1:2

In every chapter, Carole examines what our Heavenly Father desires for His children to know about His care for us during our hardest seasons.

My takeaways include:

• We all have seasons of life, even long seasons, in which we have capacity to focus on only one passage of Scripture. And that is okay.
• Whatever your messy life looks like, you’re not alone.
• There’s a difference between living with fear and living in fear.
• In our hardest seasons, we help ourselves by learning to ask God the right question. Not, Why is this happening? But rather, This is happening. Now what?

In everything she shares, Carole offers tested, practical advice from a humble posture of “Friends, here’s what works for me.”

You guys, go snap up this book right now. As of this posting, it’s a crazy good deal on Amazon. Grab yourself a copy and another to gift to any friend who may be navigating a difficult season. Because when we are in trouble, we do want to know we’re not alone. Carole comes alongside readers to show that they are not. She potently shares the story of how she is living joyously now — before a happy ending. She shines a light into the darkness, revealing that, with our Heavenly Father’s help, there is goodness and hope to be found, even in our messy lives.

Hers is the best kind of story that celebrates beauty in the midst of brokenness.

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More about this book

When Carole Leathem’s husband, Bill, first began the battle with anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts, little did she know her years of rejection and identity issues would come to a head. After all, when you’re the wife of a senior pastor, there are certain expectations that come with it, and imperfection and mental illness are not among them. The pain, uncertainty, and rejection were nearly unbearable at times, but whenever Carole surrendered to God, he showed up time and time again.

Through beautiful storytelling and raw transparency, Carole chronicles her journey of overcoming abuse, addiction, and chaos that had plagued her family for generations, along with the new adventure of caring for a spouse who struggles with mental illness. Full of heartache, hope, and new beginnings, Finding Joy in My Messy Life shows how to experience joy no matter your circumstances. Carole’s story testifies that God is a personal God, who loves our imperfect selves perfectly and without conditions and sees our trials as gifts. Life may be messy, but as Carole reveals, the joy of Christ can still reign.

More about the author

Carole Leathem was a Hollywood commercial actress and pastor’s wife. When her husband developed anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts, Carole began sharing the chaos and messiness of caring for someone with a mental illness. Through her ministry, Carole’s Journey, she encourages and uplifts hundreds of women all over the country with her flair for storytelling and raw transparency. Carole and her husband, Bill, live in Bakersfield, California, and are the parents to two grown miracle children and grandparents to seven grandchildren.

Connect with Carole at carolesjourney.com.

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